Depressed.

Have you ever felt so lost and no one around you understands how you feel.
I swear I never felt so depressed in my 19 years living till today.
I have to deal with college, assignments, presentations, trainings, taekwondo, physiotherapy, parents, family, people asking me to change, telling me how I am, telling me how ugly I am.
Shit hurts yaw.
Those shits hurt, so bad.
I'm only 19 and I'm already feeling tired of life. WHY.
I should be enjoying my last year as a teen and not care about life so quickly.
I had tried to change, but I guess that's just not good enough for everyone.
I'm sorry.
I can't live up to your expectations.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I'm stupid.
I'm sorry for being ugly.
I'm sorry for being fat.
I'm sorry for voicing out my opinions.
I'm sorry I live.
I'm sorry for being me.
I'm never anyone's first choice.
It's hard being me.
Everything I do is never good enough for anyone.
I'm just asking for alil love, not asking for much.
I want to come home happy.
I wish I could chase my dreams.
But I guess all those things only exist in a dream.

Been crying myself to sleep for 3 days straight.
Not eating right.
Being yelled at where ever I go.
It feels like whatever I do is wrong.
I'm sorry to love someone is a crime.
It sucks to see someone you love, love someone else.
It sucks that people only look for you when they need something.
It sucks how much someone who is so close to you suddenly disappear just like that.
It sucks how someone can give you so much hope and it all ends up as false hopes.

"I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing."

We all have a story to tell.

I met this friend from this National tournament in Johor. 

She is from KL Sports School.

So I asked her how was her daily routine like in that school.

She said morning attend school, evening training, night study time.

Almost everyday.

Well, I'm going to try it.

Hoping from my parents support on it too.

& gotta keep my grades up too.

Personal training starts tomorrow.

How far I come.

Medals.

They are just a piece of plastic to some people. 

But not for me. 

I love all my medals.

Medals tell me how much I gone through & achieved something in my taekwondo life.

More medals to come, I promise that.

Replay.

Oh how much I love my team. <3

Throwbacks.

Hi I'm back. Been months since I last blogged. 

Been training and going to alot of National competitions recently.

Hahaha, so my coach has been working out alot recently too. 

Look at his muscles. Bigger than my face!

Speed power.

Competition right after the day I came back from NS :) hahaah

Didn't take part, of course.

Was for 14-17

Went to help coach and cheered :)

This is how much I miss Taekwondo.

Prom.

Super late post. 

SMK Taman SEA Prom 2012 :)

The Monster Ball <3

Me & Anne

My prom date - Chin Wai :)

SKTM people :)